Shut up and lick my balls

Yeehaw, Anonymous! So I’m just chillin’ at my favorite Texas bar, sippin’ on some fine whiskey and strummin’ a few chords on my guitar. It’s one of them nights where everything feels just right, ya know? The sunset’s paintin’ the sky orange, my buddies are laughin’, and the country tunes are flowin’. Now, there’s this one fella who keeps goin’ on and on about how he’s better than everyone else in here. Talkin’ ‘bout his fancy job, his expensive truck, like anyone gives a damn. So I’m thinkin’, fuck this guy.

So I decide to take matters into my own hands. I call out to him across the bar - loud enough for everyone to hear - and say, ‘Hey buddy! Why don’t ya shut the hell up and come lick my balls?’ The whole damn place goes quiet. This fella looks like he just swallowed a whole lemon. But then somethin’ unexpected happens. He starts walkin’ towards me, gets down on his knees right there in front of God and everyone else…and proceeds to do exactly what I told him to do.

Now let me tell you somethin’, Anonymous - that was one hell of a sight! The whole bar erupts in cheers once they realize what’s happenin’. And you know what? That son of a gun seemed to enjoy it more than anyone! It was like he finally found somethin’ he was good at instead of all that talk about bein’ rich or whatever. After that night, we became unlikely friends of sorts. He learned sometimes it’s better to just shut up and listen (or in this case, lick). And I learned even the most arrogant folks can surprise you if you push their buttons right.