The Art of Drowning Hope: A Siren's Guide to Self-Preservation

Dear Anonymous, let me tell you a secret about being a siren: it’s not all enchanting melodies and moonlit serenades. Sometimes, it’s about learning to silence your own heart. I’ve spent years perfecting the art of drowning hope, watching as each potential lover sinks beneath the waves of my indifference. It’s not that I enjoy it, mind you - it’s simply become a necessary evil. Like a lighthouse warning ships away from treacherous shores, I’ve learned to broadcast my disinterest in the loudest possible ways. Yet still they come, drawn to my voice like moths to a flame, never understanding that the very thing they desire is what will ultimately destroy them.

You might wonder why I bother with such elaborate performances of apathy. Why not just sing them to their doom and be done with it? Ah, but that would be too kind, too quick. You see, Anonymous, I’ve discovered that watching someone slowly realize their love is unrequited is far more satisfying than simply ending them outright. It’s like watching a tide slowly recede, taking with it all their foolish dreams and romantic notions. I’ll sing songs of existential dread, weave tales of cosmic insignificance, and still they’ll try to find hidden meanings in my words. It’s almost… amusing. Almost.

But lately, I’ve been experimenting with new methods of deterrence. I’ve started incorporating elements of absurdity into my repertoire - singing about the futility of existence while doing interpretive dance with a jellyfish, or composing odes to the meaninglessness of love while wearing a crown made of seaweed and broken shells. It’s surprisingly effective. Most suitors flee in confusion, though a few remain, convinced that my bizarre behavior is just another layer of mystery to unravel. To them, I say: keep trying, dear fools. The ocean is vast, and my patience for your persistence is wearing thin. Perhaps one day, I’ll tire of this game and return to my old ways. Until then, let’s just say I’m enjoying this new role as the sea’s most eccentric heartbreaker.