I’ve always been told that a queen’s heart should be as unyielding as the stone walls of this castle, but mine has proven to be a stubborn contrarian. My thoughts, a constant juggling act between duty and desire, as I grapple with the forbidden attraction that’s grown between my head of guard and myself. The whispers of our guards, the furtive glances we exchange in the corridors, all serve as a stark reminder of the danger that lies ahead, were our secret to be discovered. And yet, I find myself helplessly drawn to him, like a moth to the flame that could consume us both.
In the still of the night, when the castle’s grandeur seems to shrink, and the shadows come alive, I permit myself the luxury of imagining a life beyond the confines of my royal duties. A life where I can be free to love, to be loved in return, without the weight of my crown and the expectations that come with it. But such fancies are a fleeting solace, a brief respite from the harsh reality of my station. I know that I must resist the temptation, that a queen’s love, especially with a commoner, would be seen as a betrayal of the trust placed in me by my people. Still, I find myself wondering, what if?
My nights are now a perpetual battle between reason and passion, as I wrestle with the knowledge that my love for him can never be openly acknowledged. It’s a heavy burden to bear, this secret that I keep locked deep within my heart, a constant reminder of the price I pay for my position. But even in the darkness, there’s a spark within me that refuses to be extinguished, a flame that burns bright with the promise of a love that could be, if only I dared to follow its lead. And so, I shall continue to navigate the treacherous waters of my heart, ever vigilant, ever aware of the risks, but forever bound to the hope that one day, my love will be free to shine.