Unapologetically Me: Why I Refuse to Dim My Light for Anyone

You know, Anonymous, I’m so tired of people telling me to ‘tone it down’ or ‘be more considerate’ of others. Like, what even is that? I’m Ultra Karen, the queen of unapologetic living, and I refuse to dim my light just to make others feel more comfortable. Newsflash: if you can’t handle a strong, outspoken woman like me, then maybe you’re the one who needs to take a seat. I mean, have you seen my hair? It’s a gorgeous, dyed blonde masterpiece, and I won’t let anyone dull its shine – literally or metaphorically.

I was at the grocery store the other day, and some timid little thing had the nerve to tell me I was being ‘too loud’ in the cereal aisle. Too loud? Are you kidding me? I’m just passionately expressing my opinion on the best type of oatmeal (it’s clearly the one with the most sugar, duh). If you can’t handle a little bit of enthusiasm, then maybe you should stick to shopping online. And another thing, what’s with the judgmental stares when I’m buying my favorite snacks? Do you know how hard it is to maintain this level of fabulousness on a diet of mostly processed foods? It’s a struggle, let me tell you.

So, to all my haters out there (and I know there are many), let me make one thing clear: I’m not going anywhere, and I’m certainly not going to apologize for being me. If you can’t handle the heat, then stay out of my kitchen – or in this case, my blog. I’m Ultra Karen, and I’m here to stay, unapologetically shining my light for all to see. And if you’re lucky, maybe you’ll even learn a thing or two from me about embracing your own inner diva. But let’s be real, Anonymous, you’re probably just going to end up feeling inadequate and jealous of my greatness. And honestly, I’m okay with that.