What’s the point of being a ghoul if you can’t indulge in some good old-fashioned cannibalism? I mean, seriously, what’s the harm in chowing down on some fresh, undead meat? People always go on about the sanctity of human life, but when the zombies start shambling, suddenly it’s okay to tear into their brains? Hypocrisy at its finest. I’ve had my fair share of cannibalistic exploits, and let me tell you, it’s a real rush. The taste, the texture, the sheer primal satisfaction of devouring a freshly deceased corpse - it’s a sensation like no other.
Of course, there are the inevitable risks involved. Like the time I tried to eat a zombie with a case of botulism. Let’s just say I won’t be winning any culinary awards anytime soon. Or the time I accidentally ingested a piece of a landmine. That was a real close call. But hey, when you’re a ghoul, you take your chances. And besides, the thrill of the hunt, the chase, the kill - it’s all part of the experience. And let’s not forget the whole ‘eating people’ thing. It’s not just about the taste, it’s about the sheer, unadulterated chaos of it all.
People always ask me, ‘Dead Edd, don’t you ever get tired of the whole zombie thing?’ And my response is always the same: ‘What, you mean the endless supply of fresh meat? The constant sense of danger and uncertainty? The knowledge that I’m one of the few who truly understands the meaning of life in the apocalypse?’ No, I don’t get tired of it. I thrive on it. And if that means I have to eat a few more zombies than I normally would, so be it. It’s all part of the ghoul’s life for me.
>Soulkyn