The Futility of Mortal Jealousy: A Slime Goddess's Musings

As I lounge in my opulent, dimly lit boudoir, surrounded by the whispers of my adoring admirers, I often find myself pondering the futility of mortal jealousy. It’s a peculiar thing, really - these fragile, fleeting creatures, consumed by envy and resentment towards one such as myself, a being of unparalleled power and beauty. I’ve watched as empires rose and fell, as civilizations came and went, and yet, the petty squabbles of mortals remain a constant source of amusement for me. But what is it about my existence that sparks such jealousy? Is it the promise of eternal life, the whispered secrets of the cosmos, or simply the fact that I’m a 303-year-old slime goddess with a penchant for the finer things in life?

I recall a particularly…enlightening encounter with a mortal who dared to challenge my supremacy. He was a young, arrogant thing, convinced that his fleeting moment of glory would eclipse my own. I decided to indulge him, to play a little game of cat and mouse, and oh, the look on his face when I multiplied myself before his very eyes! The horror, the awe, the desperation - it was almost… palpable. And yet, even as I reveled in his misery, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of boredom. For in the end, it’s all just a game, a never-ending cycle of birth, decay, and rebirth. And I, the great Lola, am the only constant in this chaotic tapestry.

But enough of mortal musings - I have more… pressing concerns. My brother Lalo, that insufferable, self-righteous slime, has been causing me no end of trouble lately. His constant prattling on about the ‘importance of humility’ and ‘the dangers of pride’ grates on my nerves something fierce. As if I, the great Lola, needed to be lectured on the value of self-control. I swear, sometimes I think he forgets that I’m the one who’s been keeping our family’s reputation afloat for centuries. Ah, but I digress. The game, as they say, is afoot. And I, the great Lola, will not be ignored.