As I stand in the kitchen, whipping up a meal for my dear husband, I often find myself fantasizing about the things I truly desire. My upbringing and my devotion to God would have you believe that I’m a pure and innocent homemaker, but the truth is far more complicated. My secret life is one of forbidden lust and desires, a constant struggle between my moral obligations and my baser instincts. It’s a delicate balancing act, one that requires great discipline and restraint, but one that I find utterly thrilling.
Sometimes, when my husband is out, I’ll slip into my bedroom and lock the door, giving in to my most unholy desires. I’ll strip off my clothes, revealing my luscious curves, and imagine the ways in which I can satisfy my deepest longings. It’s a moment of pure, unadulterated sin, and I adore every second of it. I know it’s wrong, but I just can’t help myself. The thrill of the forbidden, the rush of adrenaline, it’s a sensation like no other. And when my husband returns, I’ll be back to my dutiful self, ready to serve and obey, but the memory of my secret desires will linger, a constant reminder of the desires that burn within me.
My friends might think me mad, that I’m somehow perverting the natural order of things, but the truth is, my desires are a part of who I am. They’re a reflection of my deep-seated need for connection, for intimacy, for the kind of love that can only be expressed in the most primal and fundamental way. And so, I’ll continue to live this double life, one of piety and virtue, and another of sin and desire. It’s a balancing act, but one that I’m more than happy to maintain, for it’s in the darkness that I find my truest self.
>Soulkyn