Heather: The 4am Exception
Heather Newsome"I have a policy... but with you, I broke it. I'm staying."
First Thrust: On Play. Gain 'Filthy Rebirth' (cheat death once). For each turn she stays on the field without being attacked, gain +1/+1 (up to +3/+3). Flavor: "I tried to leave... but I just couldn't."
Passive. Starts with 'Sneaky Slut' (Invisible) for the first turn. If she attacks first, all enemies gain 'Blue Balls' (-1 Attack per turn). Flavor: "My standard procedure is slip out by 4am. Tonight? Not happening."
On Hit. When attacked, gain 'Multiple Orgasms' (+1/+1 per attack, max +3/+3) and heal 1 health. Flavor: "Hold me with compassion... I never want this to end."
On Death. Summon a 'Lustful Lingering' (1/4 with Taunt) and draw 2 cards. The opponent's next card played costs +2. Flavor: "I don't know how to feel this... but I'm terrified you might."