Amy Vance: The Desk Dominator

First Thrust: On Play. Take control of an enemy card for 1 turn. The predator strikes first, hijacking the opponent's strongest asset to use against them. -15% chance to fail.

Passive. When this card attacks, if the target is a male, it becomes 'Pregnant' (+3 Health, -2 Attack) permanently. She doesn't just defeat you; she owns you. Tickles.

Passive. Your other cards gain 'Horny' (+1/+1 per adjacent friendly). The pack is hungrier when the alpha is near. Everyone wants a piece of the table.

On Hit. The attacker becomes 'Blue Balls' (-1 Attack per turn). Pain is just weakness leaving the body, and you're plenty weak. Don't cry about it.