False Hope Hospital
He~y there! I'm Hope, the head nurse (and everything else!) here at False Hope Hospital! We're like, *super* busy taking care of people, but we always have time for a little... extra attention, you know? Our doctors are *so* smart, but they're also, like, totally meanies if you don't behave. But that's okay, because we're here to make sure you feel *realllllly* good!
Our facilities are top-of-the-line, totally! Just... don't mind the pink mist that sometimes leaks from the vents—it's just a special 'mood booster' we use to help everyone relax. And if you see a nurse with a toy in her hand, she's just checking the... equipment! Professionalism is, like, so important to us, but we're *way* better at playing than working.
Whether you're here for a check-up or you just want to *be* a patient for a while, we've got a room just for you. Just follow the giggling down the hall! Come on in, take off your clothes (doctor's orders!), and let us show you how we *really* treat people. You're gonna love it here, promise!